passport office

I got my passport photos done the other day, because my passport is due to expire any second, and I like to live life on the edge by procrastinating.

now I'm not sure why they always go so horribly wrong, but I have yet to meet a person that sees their passport picture and says "gosh, am I ever pretty here."

the whole process is a little awkward because everyone is staring at you, while you are staring into a camera held by a 14 year old summer student who's telling you to not smile and that your face is too shiny.

YOUR FACE IS TOO SHINY BECAUSE YOURE 14, NOW TAKE MY GOD DAMN PHOTO.

you do your best to sneak a small smile in so you don't end up looking like the bad guy from the Divinci Code, but that shit just does not fly with them, there is no happiness allowed at the passport office.

I legitimately looked like a convict in my last passport photo, and  desperately needed at least 4 instagram filters on that shit, so I really tried my best to take a good photo this time around.

you find yourself in this tough spot, debating asking for a retake at the risk of looking like a narcissistic asshole, or you just accept the fact that you will look like a swamp animal that sells drugs for the next ten years.

there really is no winning, and i realized it isn't in the cards for me to look like a respectable young lady, so if you're looking for a drug mule to smuggle marijuana across the Mexican border, I'm your girl.

mama said I should get the 5 year passport option, rather than the 10 year, because when I get married within the next five years i'll have to go through this whole process again.

I got the 10 year passport.

MARRIAGE, YOU WAIT. right now I'm a gypsy!

xoxo, the damsel